When They Need Us: A Practical Guide for Adults Caring for Aging Parents

Most caregiving books assume you can drive over on a Sunday afternoon.This one was written for those who cannot.Whether you are caring for an aging parent from across the country, from another continent, or from the same city but across a lifetime of complicated history — When They Need Us meets you where you are. Written by a theologian, pastoral counselor, and licensed professional counselor who cared for her own parents from thousands of miles away, this book holds together what most caregiving guides keep apart: clinical knowledge, spiritual depth, and the honest truth of what it costs to love aging parents well.Inside you will find:How to navigate family conflict, sibling tension, and unequal sacrifice without destroying the relationships that remainHow to communicate across faith, medicine, and cultural differences when your parent refuses careHow to recognize the stages of grief before death — the long goodbye of dementia and cognitive declineHow to make end-of-life decisions with clarity, dignity, and peaceHow to care for yourself — emotionally, spiritually, and physically — without guiltClinical tools, reflection exercises, and chaplain notes grounded in decades of professional practiceThis is not a book of easy answers. It is a companion for the long road — written by someone who has walked it personally and professionally, who has sat at bedsides and in counseling offices and on long-distance phone calls with families who were doing the impossible and needed to know it was worth it."You were not absent. You were living a life that had legitimate demands. The work you gave does not need your parent's acknowledgment to have been real."For adult children who are navigating the most demanding season of love they have ever known — this book begins for you. Read more